May your beers always be overflowing, and may your costume be pertinent. May your ants be crawling upon the log that has nestled into yon fire, and may it burn there next to the remnants of whatever bottles steve put in the fire last night. may your tent be many poled, and may your meal that is prepared for others be to their satisfaction. may your watermelons always lead to fights, and may your puns be everflowing and numerous and never repetitive and never repetitive. Please bless our vehicles as we attempt to coordinate their shuttling and parking by using a diagram deigned by your divine hand, and may you smile down upon us as we practice yoga on your blessed shores. may you only allow weed brownies in times of great distress as they serve to remove us from the festivities for excessive napping. may your henckels knife set never be pilfered, and may your erection go ever forth unto the night as yon maiden pleasures it in spurious attempts of fire out-putting.may your inflatables be ever inflated as quickly as your grace ordains. may you not allow for lame excuses for lack of attendance, and may you be pleased by our tributes of consuming unhealthily aged beer from beneath your holy bathroom sink. in this we pray.
eleven... twelve... thirteen
DEAR LEAH, THIS YEARS DATES ARE AUGUST 22nd-25th, 2013
(next year: Aug 14th-17th, 2014)
|
"COSTUME BALL ...with prizes"
|
some people look forward to special hol-i-days
and some people plan for small get-aways
but not you, my friend, you're far too serene.
you look forward to ELEVEN TWELVE THIRTEEN.
some folks have asked, with sideways a glance,
"what goes on up there? do you even wear pants?"
but that's merely and simply because they don't know
what it's like to be a part of a dirty puppet show.
but you certainly do, you and your kind.
and this is your calling, this is your time.
august is coming and don't you forget it.
if you don't reply-to-all now you'll surely regret it!
think of the history, think of the splendor!
think of the feeling of your brains in a blender
when you awake from rye beer fueled dreams
of seeing two angels wearing your fat jeans.
remember your first time, that is, if you can.
you came home with many odd lines of tan
and a pile of memories full of your friends
and that burning desire to do it all agains.
the eighth month of the year will likely be busy
with many events and drinks that are fizzy,
but that's why we start in april to plan
so that hopefully we can include shannon mann
picture yourself, on a beach that is sandy
while wally pantomimes giving a handy
to eli's speedo as families watch disgusted
and start calling the sheriff to have us arrested.
there will be beer, and plenty to snack on
and this day in history, for us to look back on
i hope tatum and bree will keep making movies,
and include another guest shot of olivia's boobies.
koc and steve, and maybe even willy
will certainly be there with costumes that are silly
and gabby will stop by and laugh and play
and do whatever else we're all doing that day
carmen and lance will be there late at night
when the sun slips down and hides out of sight
and eric arnell will tell the worlds funniest joke
or read a book about halo while my cigars i smoke.
will jaclyn and colin make their triumphant return?
will kyle holmes make a mug out of an urn?
what about kat? and beastman and ganelle?
will kristie and skylar return as well?
what about george sanford, is he still alive?
he probably is, he even fire survives.
we know leah delmer will win a prize
for her lifetime achievement of coming no times.
so please take a moment to think with your heart
about that time of year when life really starts
and you and your friends are together at last
for some time in the present to think of the past
when you can be free and be who you want
without worrying about your text color or font
without thinking of work or school or whatever
and just be with your loved ones and pretend its forever.
so start right damn now, and reply to all
and tell every single person by email or call
that you want to be with them, you want them to come
on august ninth tenth and eleventh for fun
to our part of the world where our hearts are free
where we put out the fire with epic long pees
where we frolic and play in beautiful weather
and enjoy the hell out of just being together.
luv, brian
P.S. special retro throwback below:
and some people plan for small get-aways
but not you, my friend, you're far too serene.
you look forward to ELEVEN TWELVE THIRTEEN.
some folks have asked, with sideways a glance,
"what goes on up there? do you even wear pants?"
but that's merely and simply because they don't know
what it's like to be a part of a dirty puppet show.
but you certainly do, you and your kind.
and this is your calling, this is your time.
august is coming and don't you forget it.
if you don't reply-to-all now you'll surely regret it!
think of the history, think of the splendor!
think of the feeling of your brains in a blender
when you awake from rye beer fueled dreams
of seeing two angels wearing your fat jeans.
remember your first time, that is, if you can.
you came home with many odd lines of tan
and a pile of memories full of your friends
and that burning desire to do it all agains.
the eighth month of the year will likely be busy
with many events and drinks that are fizzy,
but that's why we start in april to plan
so that hopefully we can include shannon mann
picture yourself, on a beach that is sandy
while wally pantomimes giving a handy
to eli's speedo as families watch disgusted
and start calling the sheriff to have us arrested.
there will be beer, and plenty to snack on
and this day in history, for us to look back on
i hope tatum and bree will keep making movies,
and include another guest shot of olivia's boobies.
koc and steve, and maybe even willy
will certainly be there with costumes that are silly
and gabby will stop by and laugh and play
and do whatever else we're all doing that day
carmen and lance will be there late at night
when the sun slips down and hides out of sight
and eric arnell will tell the worlds funniest joke
or read a book about halo while my cigars i smoke.
will jaclyn and colin make their triumphant return?
will kyle holmes make a mug out of an urn?
what about kat? and beastman and ganelle?
will kristie and skylar return as well?
what about george sanford, is he still alive?
he probably is, he even fire survives.
we know leah delmer will win a prize
for her lifetime achievement of coming no times.
so please take a moment to think with your heart
about that time of year when life really starts
and you and your friends are together at last
for some time in the present to think of the past
when you can be free and be who you want
without worrying about your text color or font
without thinking of work or school or whatever
and just be with your loved ones and pretend its forever.
so start right damn now, and reply to all
and tell every single person by email or call
that you want to be with them, you want them to come
on august ninth tenth and eleventh for fun
to our part of the world where our hearts are free
where we put out the fire with epic long pees
where we frolic and play in beautiful weather
and enjoy the hell out of just being together.
luv, brian
P.S. special retro throwback below: